Kickstarter update #12: True Story Bro

Kieran

Developer
We promised a writing update and here it is. We have three loosely connected short thematic pieces, two of which also illustrate what could be actual gameplay experiences. By reworking encounters into a story format, you begin to get a feel for the tone we're aiming toward. Enjoy!



________________________________________________________________



They say we built cities in the sky.

The histories say we made great things, once. White pillars that never tarnished. Great monuments, and greater cities around them. We lived in tranquility. Somehow, everything changed. None can tell what the ancestors did to anger the Gods... to make them poison the water, and curse the skies.

That was lifetimes ago, so far gone that no one remembers how or even where it may have been. Others say that’s only fairy stories. That things have always been such as they are. That our ancestors scraped in the dirt just as we do today, and dreamed of greater things around the nighttime fires... just as we do today.

Myself, I couldn’t guess. I dream of walking the hills without need of a sword, of falling to sleep without setting traps against the night. Beyond that, I suppose I don’t much care.

They say we built cities in the sky... I’ll settle for travelling without looking over my shoulder, or wondering what hides within the evening mist.



___________________



The three most ill-advised words in our language are “I’ll do it”.

"I'll do it." I said.

"Only to collect some pewter. Perhaps silver, deeper in. It's quite safe," he'd said.

"Oh, is it? Is it really?"

Of course it wasn’t. The deceit was obvious; it leaked out of him like sweat. Despite his disingenuous manner I was still tempted. No one had ever suggested venturing into the underworld might be safe, damned curiosity always did have the better of me.

Indeed the entrance was not sealed and once within I could already see the glow of those ancient lamps that never expire. As I entered I failed to check my footing and kicked something that rolled away, bouncing against the wall several feet away. Echoes faded slowly while I stood rooted to the floor, waiting. No further sounds, no movement... nervously, I looked to the ground. It was one of the lamps, inert after someone had attempted to take it.

As I traveled further down the dim corridor, the sweet and fetid smell of death reached me. Perhaps an animal sought shelter and died here? The best possible outcome. The stench lead me on nonetheless, and as the corridor opened into a large hall I caught sight of a mangled body. My esteemed employer’s cousin no doubt. Away on business indeed.

Dark corridors led away from the hall to both sides. Ahead I could see a room that looked to be a dining hall. Pewter tableware lay clearly in sight. Certainly if I hoped to find silver I would have to venture further...

* * *

My skin prickled, the hairs on my arms stood on end. I could hear a faint hum coming from behind the wall. Some ancient power? The solid stonework felt impassable, but I did notice one small block protruding unusually. I checked to see if it was loose, and it sunk into the wall as if drawn from the opposite side. A grinding metallic sound startled me, and I took an involuntary step back as a deep rumble began, somewhere beyond the wall. Dust rose from the masonry and soon the entire wall began to shift, sliding into gap in the passage. Beyond, a purplish light shined from within a shallow hall. The grinding noise stopped, leaving my ears ringing. I stepped carefully into the space, following the smaller passage a short distance.

As I rounded a corner I could see corridor ended in a wall of what seemed to be thick purple smoke and water at the same time. I approached it warily and extended my hand to touch it. It tickled my hand but offered little resistance...

What happened next may never be clear to me, but suddenly I found myself elsewhere. Dimly lit white walls stained with mouldy growths stood on either side of me, and a strange unrelenting noise was just barely audible. A flash like that of lightning illuminated the dark corridor ahead, and I caught a glimpse of a monstrous white shape before the light failed.

Fearfully, I looked behind me. The walls ended into rough hewn rock only a few feet away. The passage I’d come through was gone. I drew my sword and waited for the shape to leap at me from the darkness.... nothing came. I could hear no sound but that strange quiet noise. Fighting down a rising sense of panic, I cautiously advanced down the corridor. My hands sweating, I gripped my sword, poised to strike at an invisible assailant. Ahead, swirling mists caught glimmers of light. Inch by inch, I forced myself to continue. I feared I saw shadows but nothing resolved itself in the faint and shifting mist. A wide open space lay ahead, dim light converging from various directions. As I stepped into the space I moved to my left, hoping to find a wall. My hand touched something wet and warm... a terrible, howling screech sounded in my ear, slimy goblets of liquid hit my face.... a sharp pain and hotness surrounded my neck and enveloped me.

* * *

I awoke in bright sunlight on a smooth circular stone, coughing and spewing a foul white liquid. I could barely lift my head, and my hands shook uncontrollably. I was poisoned. What of the things I’d seen? The poison had apparently induced a terrible nightmare. The man in the marketplace must have done this. My possessions were gone... he must’ve robbed me, that rotten bastard.
I suppose I still do not know what lies within the underworld. The things I saw were surely a product of the poison, but when I look upon those ominous doorways now, memories come unbidden and I cannot stop the shivers of fear.



___________________



“Demons! Easily four or five of them!”

Shouts and catcalls drowned out the old man as soon as he began. I looked over my shoulder, hoping the noise would abate... sadly, no joy. The old man rose from his seat by the fire and thumped the table, roaring for his companions to be quiet, and they mostly did so. He stared down the last of the grumbling, eyes drawn into an angry squint made comical by the chaos of his beard and hair. When all was finally calm around him, he began again.

“Demons! Easily four or five of them...”

“Demon’s Brew, I’d say” someone yelled from the back of the room.

“Damn your tongue, Baren!” the old one growled, glaring again at a few souls bold enough to laugh. I turned back to my meal. The fare in this wayside tavern was tolerable, by which I mean it was hot and probably made from a beast whose name I knew. More than that would be too much to ask, this far from the city. I ate slowly, mechanically... bored and tired, worn thin by the long walk through rough country.

Perhaps it was the hour, or the smoke, or perhaps I’m the world’s biggest fool, but by degrees I found myself listening to the old man’s yarn. Clearly told before, it had the cadence of something well rehearsed. The mutilated livestock, the family dog vanished in the night. The shadow at the window. The scratches on the doorpost. The groaning bellows from afar. The night watches kept, blade close to shaking hand. The faint, otherworldly bluish glow as something passed through the trees...

“Wait,” I said, turning around. The word was out of my mouth before I’d forethought enough to bottle it in.

“Who spoke?” the old man demanded. I’d broken the spell he was weaving, and even now many were turning away.

I stood.

“You cried ‘wait’?” he asked, frowning.

“I did. When did you claim to see these demons?”

“Barely a week since I moved aught I cared for into my sister’s house here in the village. She said-”
“And you said you saw blue? Moonlight, perhaps?” I spoke quietly, listening for the lie in his voice.

“Never moonlight, no. Not a question of being moonlight. It was unnatural!”, he said at once.

I made no reply. This yarn was hardly rehearsed, I thought. It was remembered.

“Are you offering your assistance, young stranger?” the old man asked after a moment.
“Will you go out to my farm and show this lot that old Cory’s an honest man?”

Blame the hour, or the smoke from a fire burned down to coals. Call me the world's biggest fool, but I only paused for an instant before answering.

“I’ll do it.”
 

Turmoil

Member
This gives an extremely clear idea of the kind of vibes you plan to have here.

Definitely looking forward to seeing how you execute it within the boundaries of the game.
 

Rob

Moderator
I think this is great.

Here you're appealing to those that want to read the story in detail.

However, I think you've already got these customers. Still think you need to try to appeal to the dumber mass market. Just constructive criticism.
 

Tony Dye

Insider
One of the things I enjoy doing is writing the narrative story of the gameplay parts of an RPG I'm playing, as serialized episodes. In NWN persistent worlds, our main vector for communicating things that happened in the world to players who weren't present was turning the events into a narrative tale, and getting that info out to the rest of the players. With our limited tools, that was the best system available. Getting to sort of do it in reverse, knowing that this idea of causal chains stretching out from your gameplay to shape and impact later parts of the narrative is being built right into the game itself, is very exciting to me.
 

Rob

Moderator
Hi Tony,
It's interesting that your writing in this update is description-heavy, as is the style of Robert Jordan, rather than dialogue-heavy as in playwriting.

I like this - you do a fantastic job of creating an atmosphere, and making the text appropriate/relevant.

However, I can't see how this fits into the standard model of character-NPC dialogue. This intrigues me, and I can't wait to find out more about the intended form of implementation. Are you intending to have a short story (as in update 12) at various points throughout the game, perhaps at quest points? Or are you intending having some mechanism for a running text commentary as particular events unfold? Or is this sort of text intended to be less focal to gameplay, e.g. writings in books, or a game codex?

I know that you've already said this:
Tony said:
In terms of raw mechanics I really can't share anything about how the dialog system works yet. These things evolve as they're created, and we're not ready to talk yet about how it's going to be presented to the player.
so I don't expect any answers! That you haven't completely decided on the system is a fine answer. Just thought I'd let you know that you're building the suspense and I can't wait!!!
 

Tony

Insider
Hi Tony,
It's interesting that your writing in this update is description-heavy, as is the style of Robert Jordan, rather than dialogue-heavy as in playwriting.

However, I can't see how this fits into the standard model of character-NPC dialogue.
Well, if you take the text he's written into context (goal was probably to be as descriptive as possible since we know nearly nothing about the world and lore of Sui Generis), I'm thinking the dialogue in game will be a bit different. In the case of the guy who asks you to go into the mine I'm betting in-game you'll have more options to question him further. I'm also betting that if you do keep pestering him about it that he'd become irritated (since he's obviously not being honest) and he'd react differently than if you simply accept his words at face value. Again, this is only my speculation, but it seems a logical way to do it.

I'm just as curious as you to see how they do story progression (cutscenes between major events, narratives, lore in books, etc.).
 

Rob

Moderator
In the case of the guy who asks you to go into the mine I'm betting in-game you'll have more options to question him further. I'm also betting that if you do keep pestering him about it that he'd become irritated (since he's obviously not being honest) and he'd react differently than if you simply accept his words at face value.
Yes, that's nice - I think you've captured the feel of Sui Generis perfectly! It seems clear to me that the dialog options are shaping up to be quite exciting!

At the same time, I also like TonyD's non-dialogue text, and can't wait to see how it manifests within the context in the game...
 

Rob

Moderator
Addendum: I didn't mean for this statement to be seen as a negative:
However, I can't see how this fits into the standard model of character-NPC dialogue.
In retrospect, I can see that you may have thought I was being negative, but I wasn't! Rather, I was just musing the potential for innovative non-standard systems that aren't present in other games!
 

Tony

Insider
Yes, that's nice - I think you've captured the feel of Sui Generis perfectly! It seems clear to me that the dialog options are shaping up to be quite exciting!

At the same time, I also like TonyD's non-dialogue text, and can't wait to see how it manifests within the context in the game...
Agreed! I believe he's very talented and can't wait to explore a world with the depth that his writing will add to the overall experience.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Rob

Tony

Insider
Addendum: I didn't mean for this statement to be seen as a negative:

In retrospect, I can see that you may have thought I was being negative, but I wasn't! Rather, I was just musing the potential for innovative non-standard systems that aren't present in other games!
I didn't take it as a negative :) I was simply musing on the approach that he took with the pre-release text. It's well written and so I'm also excited to see what innovative ideas they use to present dialogue and lore in-game.
 

BlackPhi

Insider
Here you're appealing to those that want to read the story in detail.
However, I think you've already got these customers.
I'm not sure that is true, myself. To me the KS pitch and most of the updates look like an awesome game engine, but not much story, and even less depth of character interaction. Update #1 gave a bit of gameworld background, and this update gives a flavour of some individual quests, but the headline KS video concentrates on physics, lighting and area creation; most others focus on different areas of the underlying mechanics.

So I suspect that the bulk of the 'already got' customers are either mechanics-focussed or, like me, willing to trust that the team will get serious about story content. Hiring a writer and Kieran providing this update helps with the latter.

Edit: the initial quote was from Rob's comment up near the top.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Rob

Rob

Moderator
I'm not sure that is true, myself. To me the KS pitch and most of the updates look like an awesome game engine, but not much story, and even less depth of character interaction. Update #1 gave a bit of gameworld background, and this update gives a flavour of some individual quests, but the headline KS video concentrates on physics, lighting and area creation; most others focus on different areas of the underlying mechanics.

So I suspect that the bulk of the 'already got' customers are either mechanics-focussed or, like me, willing to trust that the team will get serious about story content. Hiring a writer and Kieran providing this update helps with the latter.

Edit: the initial quote was from Rob's comment up near the top.
For sure, I wasn't saying that it's a bad thing that this update was based on the story/writing. I think it's a fantastic update. And there should be more updates.

I'm glad that you've contradicted me when saying that we've 'already got' the customers interested in the story. You're correct - that statement was too bold.

Rather, I was trying to emphasise that perhaps something (flashy?) that appeals to an even wider market would also be useful at this stage.
 

Madoc

Project Lead
The lack of story or "lore" in our presentation has been the biggest criticism we've received so far along with not demonstrating what an actual game experience might be like so this was partly to appease those critics. Probably though the biggest problem is that our pitch video talks about tech and says very little about the game.

The narrative text is not supposed to be actual in game writing, it's there to give a sense of how the player might experience the world and how events unfold based on their actions or pure chance. Think of it as telling the story from the player character's perspective. The narrative here would be shaped by the player's actions and not a precanned sequence of events. The player could have just grabbed some pewter or also found some silver and left, but who knows what else might have happened?

These are also not isolated episodes or "quests" the idea is that by getting involved in something you might stumble into something else and that events can escalate far beyond what the initial premise suggests. We want every little story to potentially evolve into something complex. Take even the second story, why are there demons at the farmhouse? Where do they come from? What's the blue glow? And as you reveal more you also potentially discover many more questions you might want to try to answer.
 

BlackPhi

Insider
The lack of story or "lore" in our presentation has been the biggest criticism we've received so far along with not demonstrating what an actual game experience might be like so this was partly to appease those critics. Probably though the biggest problem is that our pitch video talks about tech and says very little about the game.
It's only as I follow a few KS RPG campaigns through that I'm starting to realise how difficult the pitch process actually is. On the one hand people want to actually see something 'real' demonstrated - for which your initial engine demo was ideal - on the other hand many want to be inspired about the story or the role-playing (which means different things to different people) or the character interactions or whatever - things which can't really be shown in a pre-alpha video.

For me there was enough positive story vibe in the 'about the game' section to combine with the 'wow' factor in the video to encourage me to contribute, particularly given this update. I do feel a bit concerned about the '65% complete with three days to go' situation, though.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Rob

Tony

Insider
Also, I'd like to say thanks to the Bare Mettle team for releasing these stories! I was the annoying person that kept asking for such stories on your Kickstarter page (and on these forums too). I'm hoping the stories will help spark interest in those who were on the fence about Sui Generis. Many people play RPGs for combat; however, many people also enjoy a deep, immersive and engaging game world/story. The team stated that this was their goal but actually demonstrating it with a story helps people to visualize the concept while simultaneously proving the team is capable of delivering such a story. Thanks again ;)
 

BigT2themax

Insider
I awoke in bright sunlight on a smooth circular stone, coughing and spewing a foul white liquid. I could barely lift my head, and my hands shook uncontrollably. I was poisoned. What of the things I’d seen? The poison had apparently induced a terrible nightmare. The man in the marketplace must have done this. My possessions were gone... he must’ve robbed me, that rotten bastard.
I suppose I still do not know what lies within the underworld. The things I saw were surely a product of the poison, but when I look upon those ominous doorways now, memories come unbidden and I cannot stop the shivers of fear.
I thought this part was a little bit strange the first time I'd read it. I always thought to myself "how could he have been poisoned? Why didn't he think it was strange that he was still conscious for his entire trip to the entrance to the underworld and the things that happened wherein? Why would the merchant place him on that round stone instead of just throwing him into a ditch?"

That, combined with the knowledge that you lose your possesions upon death, made me realise something.

The "nightmare" must have been real, and whatever monster he discovered down there killed him. This being the main protagonist, he's resurrected for the first time, and the smooth round stones are actually the places where he comes back to life, sans his equipment. He doesn't realise he's been resurrected, as he still doesn't know or understand the nature of his powers.

At least, that's MY guess on what's going on there.
 

Fawz

Insider
Yeah that's also my take on it. I like the idea and especially appreciate that they hide small hints like that throughout the info they give us. It might feel like they don't share much with us, but that's because they're very careful with what they show. They've already started trying to lure us into their world and prepare us for the adventure of mystery :D
 

muxor

Insider
Amazing. If the devs can push novelistic narration/NPC dialogue, it would damn near push the game into its own genre of modern art nouveau novelistic fiction-based verisimilitude! (what the old boys would term 'taking it back to the old school, for real'). The biggest problem I have with most games today is mass-market appeal - the game is muted to please the broadest section of the market. In reality, these people have no idea - they are just followers of a pre-conceived idea of what makes the most marketing sense. In the early days, there were no markets - there were just awesome concepts that deserved followers. When it was about small dev teams expermenting with new ideas and systems, magic happened. We only remember what is truly awe-inspiring, new, and ground-shattering. If we are to build something that is of that sort, we must forget all that has come before it and let this 'beast' be all it can be because imagination and innovation (along with an opposable thumb) is what separates us from the primates!
 

muxor

Insider
AND another thing - If the main characters/NPC's themselves not sure of what is happening it helps evoke feelings of uncertainty and fear in ourselves, which is emotionally involving. I don't think mortals should be able to even begin to fathom what lies above or beneath - the capability is not within our genetic framework, heck, we don't even know whats at the bottom of the deepest parts of the ocean let alone the unused parts of our brains. These 'Demons' as they call them - it's a colloquial term for "some weird unknown thing that will mess you up if within 30 yards, so best stay away and keep up with the daily prayers". Also, on a lighter note, giant spiders are dumb so don't include those.
 
Top

Home|Games|Media|Store|Account|Forums|Contact




© Copyright 2019 Bare Mettle Entertainment Ltd. All rights reserved.